The Power of Introverts
Salam lebaran semua. Semoga semuanya dapat menikmati hari raya tahun ini, dipermudahkan segala urusan dan dijauhi sebarang musibah. Ok starting here I must apologise because I am more comfortable in explaining in english and this will be a bit long rant (pls dont be mad).
Lately weve read more stories of people having troubles with socialising, communicating and being just plain awkward with others. Most of these people are self-proclaimed introverts. Of course we dont know how to exactly measure how much introverted/extroverted we are really. Simply put, introverts basically feel like our energy are drained when we spend too much time with other people or with too many people. Most commonly is because we tend to take a lot in and have to process all the information so it gets really tiring to deal with too many people at once.
So when we are quiet, we usually are ruminating over thoughts and ideas. In my opinion, yes, we can take longer time to come up with proper responses. But when speaking verbally, the time is often limited and we find ourselves frustrated, flustered while trying to come up with an answer AND other people will find it frustrating to wait for us to respond.
We became extremely shy and feel pressured to perform well in verbal communication skills because the world we live in glorifies the perks of being an extrovert: loud, opinionated and excessively confident. The stronger these qualities you have, the more successful you will be they said. But its not true. I dont say this to degrade or hate on extroverts because people who are extrovert-inclined have their own important roles to play in the community.
Just like extroverts, believe it or not, introverts can also be as important and many of them have been making histories since forever. You guys can read more about this in Quiet, written by Susan Cain. She explained all the myths and lore of how society tend to belittle introvert qualities and give all attention to how being extrovert is the key to success. I can guarantee that this is a very insightful reading.
I would like to recommend Quiet for fellow introverts who would like to seek enlightenment and ways to empower oneself when you are a quiet person in a loud world.
Now, I get it, it is hard to mingle with others when we feel awkward and shy. But Id like to say it is their loss if they cannot befriend you like they expect to. People generally missed out on the joy of not having to speak your each and every thought..but each to their own, I guess. My point is you dont have to feel sad if youre rejected for being too quiet for them.
I am a medical student and I am a very introverted person. I couldnt even bear the thought of having to socialise in a group of more than 4 people. I used to hate the fact that I am too shy for my own good and for this, I tried befriending some of my friends closely. In spite of this, I am nothappy.
Dont get me wrong; my friends are great and they are kind and good people but if I am with them, I feel trapped because Id be the follower of the group. I would rarely get the chance to express myself and just suppress my true feelings. Like if they wanted to go trekking but Id much rather make a trip to the bookstores when we go on vacation these kind of things.
Even my professors would say that being able to shine and confidently SPEAKING is the best quality of a med student. Uh oh. Speak. The one kryptonite for introverts and shy people. I became more sad and hateful of myself because i know I cant be loud, nor can I be very active. Just last year I was diagnosed with mild depression and general anxiety disorder. Can you imagine? Studying to treat and heal other people and one day, you become a patient to the cases youve been studying in your textbooks. I am still trying to get better and I do feel better now, actually. I became soo angry and ashamed of myself that I began losing interest in my life. Through encouragement and support from my friends, I am coping well though I have not fully recovered yet.
I began learning more about introversion and out of curiosity, I did the proper Myer-Briggs personality test (16 MBTI types) and I am an INFP. Figures! Because infps are very introverted and are often lost in daydreaming and being emotional about the smallest things and noticing even the smallest of details.
Theres also a number of famous people who are INFPs like JRR Tolkien, Tim Burton, Shakespeare, George Orwell, Poe, Johnny Depp, John Lennon just to name a few. In our case, we might be very bad and awkward at verbal communication but we are powerful in other aspects. Which is why I am confident in writing and linguistics, more so than my speech ability. (Nah, Im not showing off but this is really how i write). and i am proud of this! The fact that I have something similar in my personality as theirs make me believe that I can achieve greater heights in my own way!
I believe that self-empowerment is important in introverts, especially in Malaysia where even as kids, being shy puts you in a great disadvantage. So dont be discouraged when you feel out of place with certain people. Perhaps, when they reject you, it is a sign showing that youd never fully be able to bloom when youre with them. The time will come when youll find the right people who will appreciate you the way you are: a quiet person in this very loud and deafening world.
P/s: seriously, you all kena baca Quiet, very good informations there
P/p/s: I am relearning Bahasa Melayu properly. Doakan saya berjaya ye!
Sumber & Kredit: iiumc